Identity - Who are you, really?
Updated: Jul 30, 2019
Over the last little while I have been thinking a lot about Identity...what exactly that means with respect to how we define ourselves. I know for many years I defined myself as "so-n'-so's Girlfriend", "a Personal Trainer" an "Executive" and even at some points in my life some definitions I'm not even proud of, I labelled myself as "stupid" or "fat", even "bossy". All of these words became who I was, or at least the Identity I gave myself.
I began to realize that labeling yourself with an Identity is a dangerous practise. After I was no longer "so-n'-so's Girlfriend" which I was for 8 years, I felt stripped of my identity, naked, worthless. It became clear to me that the label I had given myself was in fact a label of self-worth. I was no body unless I was that. How many times have you seen movie stars or athletes at the top of their game, and once their time in the spotlight came to an end, the career they labelled their identity with changed or went away, many of them resorted to alcohol or drugs, crime or abuse to mask the pain of losing who they thought they were. I challenge you to ask yourself, what labels of Identity do you have placed on yourself? Are you a "secretary", perhaps a "Mum", or a "song writer", maybe a "body builder", "restaurant owner", or "yoga instructor"? These aren't who you are, they are what you DO. If we take ownership over a word, a label, a mask, it becomes who we believe we are, and if that thing no longer exists, let's say you get into an accident and can no longer use your legs, your career as a soccer player or body builder comes to an end...so does your Identity. And when you lose your identity, you lose your purpose, and that is never a place you want or wish anyone to be in.
So if you are not those things that you DO, who are you? You are YOU. And so what do I mean by this? You are a combination of everything that you feel and do, with zero labels. You are caring, loving, intelligent, smart, talented, creative, beautiful, fun, adventurous and sexy. You are the spirit that lives within you, not the label that is on the outside others may see. If your Identity label was striped away, who is left? The same loving, caring, smart, intelligent, talented, creative, beautiful, fun, adventurous and sexy woman you are right now, who has a whole list of things that she does but is not defined by.
Don't be afraid to let go of your labels, they are not who you are. They are holding you back from being more then that thing, that activity, that figure whom you believe is important...they bind you and leave you stripped of your true being when they get torn away. YOU are more then an Identity label, you are whole, complete, and have endless gifts to offer the world...so break free, take off the Identity mask and let the world see all sides of you, all the gifts that truly make up you.
~ Monika xo